MESSY MONDAYS

Dissociation is the nervous system’s way of protecting you when something feels overwhelming, unsafe, or too painful to fully process. When fight, flight, or fawn do not feel possible, the body may learn to disconnect. For many trauma survivors, dissociation was not the problem at first. It was the solution. It helped you survive. But over time, the same response that once protected you can begin to interfere with feeling present, connected, emotionally regulated, and safe in

Anxiety does not make you too much. Having needs does not make you too much. Feeling deeply does not make you too much. Sometimes these beliefs are not random. They may be connected to trauma, childhood experiences, emotional neglect, attachment wounds, difficult relationships, or years of being made to feel like your feelings were inconvenient. EMDR therapy can help women gently explore where these painful beliefs began and how they continue to show up in the present.

EMDR has eight phases, and the actual trauma reprocessing does not begin until Phase 4. Your first session is not about forcing you into the hardest memory or asking you to “go there” before you feel safe. Instead, the beginning of EMDR is focused on understanding your story, identifying what feels overwhelming, building trust, and helping your nervous system feel more supported.

Sometimes a child does not need a lesson. Sometimes a child does not need perspective. Sometimes a child does not need to be inspired, corrected, redirected, or reminded that everything happens for a reason. Sometimes a child needs a parent to sit on the edge of the bed and say, “That makes sense. I’m here. You don’t have to figure this out by yourself.” Emotional neglect is not always loud or obvious. It is not always a parent being cruel, absent, or intentionally dismissive

Maybe nothing “big enough” happened. Maybe your childhood looked fine from the outside. Maybe your parents provided for you, you had good moments, or you know other people went through worse. Maybe the painful experience was something you have minimized for years because it did not seem severe enough to call trauma.

Even when things are technically okay, your body may not fully believe it. You might find yourself scanning for changes in someone’s tone, overthinking every interaction, bracing for disappointment, or feeling like peace is temporary and something is about to fall apart. This is often what it feels like when your nervous system is stuck in survival mode.

EMDR is not about forcing you to relive panic. It’s a gentle, structured process that builds safety first, then helps your brain release what’s been keeping you stuck. As your body learns to settle, panic no longer has the same grip.

Body sensations are one aspect of memory. This is why EMDR can feel different from traditional talk therapy; it addresses all aspects of the traumatic memory. EMDR allows your nervous system to gently process what has been held internally.

If you are looking for trauma therapy, it makes sense to wonder which approach will actually be the best fit for you. There are several evidence-based trauma treatments out there, and it can feel overwhelming trying to sort through the options. The good news is that you do not have to figure that out on your own. Two of the most effective trauma therapy approaches are Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing (EMDR) Therapy and Cognitive Processing Therapy (CPT). Both can

Trauma often pulls us out of alignment, not just mentally and emotionally, but physically and energetically. Many trauma survivors feel stuck in survival mode, disconnected from their bodies, or constantly overwhelmed by stress. Practices like yoga, mindfulness, and energy work can gently help the nervous system relearn safety and bring us back into balance.

Getting to Know the Eight Phases of EMDR EMDR (Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing) is a structured therapy that helps the brain process and heal from distressing memories. A typical EMDR journey follows eight phases: History – Your therapist learns about your background and goals. Preparation – You’ll build coping skills and understand the process. Assessment – The target memory is identified, along with its image, negative belief, and body sensations. Reprocessing

Many people think of trauma as a single event: something like a car accident, a natural disaster, or a violent incident. While these experiences can absolutely be traumatic, many of the women I work with carry a different kind of trauma: complex trauma . Complex trauma often develops over time, especially in the developmental years, when someone experiences repeated or ongoing situations like emotional neglect, physical abuse, emotional abuse, or unstable caregiving. Instead

Anxiety can feel exhausting. Sometimes it shows up as constant overthinking, panic, fear of the unknown, or feeling like your body is always bracing for something bad to happen. Even when you logically know you are safe, your nervous system may not feel that way. Eye movement desensitization and reprocessing (EMDR) therapy helps us work with anxiety in a new and different way. Rather than only focusing on managing symptoms, EMDR helps identify and process the experiences, bel

I had a double mastectomy & I didn't even have breast cancer In 2025, I was diagnosed as high risk for breast cancer. Over the past several years, my healthcare team has monitored multiple lumps every six months via mammogram. It came up all too casually: "Maybe you should see a surgical oncologist to talk about your options." Two weeks later, I was walking into the oncologist's office, completely unprepared to learn how high my risk for breast cancer was according to the Tyr